How to treat your loved one when she is married to someone else?

Hi,


Perhaps, my life has many sad stories and is full of broken relationships. One of such stories is about a very beautiful girl (my friend) I used to love since I was 10. She didn't love me for almost 11 years and treated me like a good friend. But sooner, she got closer to me and fell in love with me the time when she was engaged to some one else. None of us could do anything against her parent's will. She got married to him, went abroad and has a daughter. 5 years have passed, but I still love her...of course this is a 16 year old love! I don't know if she still loves me but she is coming back wid her family to spend 2 months at my home. Now, how am I gonna deal with her and her husband? Of course, my heart will be torn apart to see her away from me and there will be some jealousy in my part that i don't want to show...How wud i behave like a gentleman? please help me :(


(please don't advise me to get into another relationship becoz my heart has been so much hurt in these relationships that i feel as if it bleeds)How to treat your loved one when she is married to someone else?
That's going to be tough on your part to deal with. The heart cant help who it loves and if you have loved this girl this long, and with her even married with a child, she must really be special.... I would suggest to be your self when she comes, try not to show the jealousy, I know that will be hard. And I know that there will be times that you can talk to her without her husband around. Tell her how you feel even after all these years. You never know, she may feel the same thing for you as well. Im not going to tell you to get into another relationship because it wouldn't really work for you, not when you still have her in your heart. But maybe seeing her and her husband, and let's not forget about the child, and if she tells you that she doesn't feel the same about you, it just might help you to get over her. But Im pulling for you, I hope you can get her and she will be all yours. Best wishesHow to treat your loved one when she is married to someone else?
You are beating yourself up for a lost cause. If you really do care about her, let it go. She deserves to be happy so why make her and yourself miserable by pursuing your infatuation with her? She has her own life and a family, let her live it her way. By meddling, you may very well destroy a friendship.





Don't give up on other relationships. I think you may go into them too seriously. Lighten up! Just go out and have fun. Treat women as friends, not prospects.
i think u should just talk about it with her to see if she feels the same way. obviously not in front of her husband. but even if she does, i dont think she can really just leave her husband %26amp; daughter.


good luck with that :
|You've received some STRANGE, yet Good Advice........





WHY in HELL did you INVITE Her %26amp; Family to stay with you. Let her stay with her 'Parents' who made her go thru with the Engagement.... BAD, BAD/DUMB MOVE, on your part!!
I am so sorry. I really know how you feel I lost a great love of my life too. Recently I met up with him and have contemplated on leaving my husband for several weeks. I love and respect my husband but I just love the other guy so much I can't help myself. We've all known each other for about eight years or so now well me and my husband know each other and me and the other guy also have known each other for a while. I could not imagine spending the rest of my life knowing that I love someone else. I feel like I am cheating on my hubby even though I'm not. I couldn't tell you how to deal with all that if I wanted too because I am one of those people who follows what their heart tells them to. Maybe you could follow your heart and do as it tells you to.
Hello, it is obvious that she never loved you as more than a good friend.


This should be very clear because she didn't respond for eleven years and one would think, if she loved you she would have protested against her marriage to her parents. You say she fell in love with you before she got engaged; how do you know that it was not out of weariness or submissiveness that she agreed to your wishes?





It seems to me that she is happily married now. If you really love her, you will not wish to create problems in her marriage or break her marriage- you will want her to be happy! Just be normal and casual with her husband and her or even better, let them stay somewhere else.





Don't get into another relationship if you don't want to, but for heaven's sake, get a life!
You must respect the marriage above all else.





Now, if she says that she is getting a divorce, be her friend through it---but nothing more until after she is divorced, AND says she is ready for another relationship.





If she has no plans of divorce, this means she is in love wither her husband now. If you truly love her, you will give her what she wants---which is her marriage.





Why are they staying with you? Is this something that can be changed? It would be extremely hard for you to tolerate, and for her, too, if she is still in love with you. It is setting up a bad situation! =oP








Good luck to you! =o)