Okay well I asked a question before about getting my daughter a puppy for christmas, due to factors brought to my attention about why that time of year could be problematic, we waited until after the holidays. My daughter has been told about getting a pet and is thrilled.
Anyway- my husband asked me to go ahead and pick out the puppy and so I looked in the paper, considering our price range etc. and didn't find any that would be suitable for our home. (We're looking to get a small to medium breed dog) so I decided to go to the local animal shelter with my daughter. Together we looked at a variety of dogs and found the most lovable (slightly timid but still approachable) beagle. Her name is Maggie and she's three years old. My daughter immediately fell in love with her.
I called my husband and explained the situation, he immediately said no way. He says that shelter dogs have too much baggage and that I'm not thinking of my daughter, who's five and will definitely want a puppy not a full grown dog. I explained to him that she really liked Maggie and he didn't buy it. I told him that she was house trained and that she'd be a great addition to our family. He got frustrated, told me to do whatever I wanted, and hung up.
I knew he'd be irritated with me and have hard feelings if I brought the dog home so I asked the woman at the shelter to *please* hold her I would be back. I came home and we talked it out. He says whatever I decide is fine because he realizes my daughter really does like Maggie, but he's still upset.
How would you have reacted to this? Do you think it'd be okay for me to adopt Maggie?What Are Your Thoughts? What Would You Do In This Situation? A LOT to read!?
That is so sad that people believe that about shelter dogs. Shelter dogs have usually been apart of a family and many where given up simply because the owner was unable to continue giving the care that was needed.
Do not let him condemn all shelter dogs. Talk to the staff about the history of the dog. There are so many wonderful dogs there. Make your husband go with you, and see the temperament. Keep trying.
additional: I am currently fostering four 5 week old puppies. What kind of baggage could they have? Many shelters foster dogs to be socialized and trained.What Are Your Thoughts? What Would You Do In This Situation? A LOT to read!?
it's true that adult dogs can have some baggage, but they still need loving homes! however, so do you. A dog is a big responsibility, and getting a dog that someone in your family DOESN'T want isn't a good way to start. Maybe a puppy from the pound?
if the dog is for your daughter let her pick it ut! your husband is acting childih to me. i would go get maggie rite now!
(:
since your daughter likes Maggie i would say yes, but if its a really big conflict, just waite to get a puppy
The newspaper has breeders adverstising to get rid of their puppies. It is not a good place to look unless you really know the signs to look for so you dont get scammed by a byb/Mill.
I love the idea of your daughter learning to rescue a shelter dog. It is really a great way to get a dog. And just so you know:
Shelter and rescue dogs are just byb/mill dogs that have been given up i.e a dog bought in a petstore is typically bought on impulse and the effects wear off so they give the dog up. Petstore puppies are mill puppies.
BYBs advertise in the paper or on craigslist typically. They are basically low scale mills.
Neither of the above places will take a dog back, which is part of any responsible breeders contract. The dog has to come back no matter the dogs age is or health.
I would write a letter since men dont typically get the silent treatment. Explain why rescuing a dog is a good thing. It will also help you to learn dog behavior. Under a good leader, dogs will set aside their emotional baggage for new less stressful ways. www.flyingdogpress.com
This book is what I am currently reading and I have, with my 11 years of living with dogs, learned so much from this book. Any dog owner/lover imo should read this book to better understand dogs and so our dogs can better understand us. Bones Would Rain from the Sky: deepening our relationships with dogs by suzanne clothier.
As with any child and dog situation, supervision is always a must.
I think someone needs to make your husband realize that a 5 year old is not in any way old enough to ';definitely want a puppy'; because a 5 year old can't handle any aspect of training a puppy. Therefore, a puppy is going to bond with the person who does that - most often the mom.
Your husband's being very immature - your daughter has already made her choice and if this beagle is as easy going with children as most beagles are, it's a really good choice.
Before you adopt Maggie, he needs to get over himself and go down to the shelter with you and see Maggie for himself as well as see for himself that his daughter - the person this dog is supposed to be for - wants THIS dog.
Shelter dogs do NOT always come with baggage. A lot of times dogs are given up for reasons out of their control.. owner's allergies, long work hours, lost their house, kid lost interest, no one bothered to housetrain the pup. All things like that, NOT necessarily behavior issues.
Honestly, a three year old dog sounds VERY good for your situation. You will be able to get an accurate idea of the dogs' adult temperament, know if it gets along with other animals, see its reaction to children, and often times not have to go through the process of house training.
Your husband is being close-minded. Honestly, any one who will sell you a dog through the newspaper from a litter they bred is probably not a good breeder. The puppy may very well have health problems and be overpriced.
I invite you to read this, it has a lot of good information about what a GOOD shelter dog is.
http://www.dogforums.com/2-general-dog-f鈥?/a>
It sounds to me like your HUSBAND is the one who ';really wanted a puppy'; just as much (if not more) than your daughter did. Clearly, your daughter loves the Beagle, and if he was really just concerned about HER feelings, he'd have seen that and let the issue go. But you're happy, your daughter is thrilled %26amp; in love with the dog...yet HE is pouting. Kinda obvious, his ';inner kid'; had his hopes up for a puppy too.
But, he also ';gave in';. My thoughts- go get the Beagle. This is supposed to be for your *daughter*....do what makes HER happy. And I'll bet, once your husband realizes that not all shelter dogs have ';baggage'; (Tell him to DO SOME RESEARCH- heck, show him these answers), he'll fall in love with her, too. Let him be irritated, let him have ';hard feelings';, he'll get over it if he's anything like my husband (LOL)....if seeing your little girl happy with a new doggy doesn't make him smile, he hasn't got a heart!!
Right now, there are a lot of people in foreclosure who are moving and have been forced to surrender otherwise healthy, happy well-trained pets. Shelters are full of them. Not all shelter dogs are given up for behavior issues....many are there because of divorce, new baby, allergies, or, like I said, moving to somewhere dogs aren't allowed. You'd be amazed at all the reasons people surrender perfectly good dogs.
Plenty of puppies come with ';baggage'; too...especially the products of backyard breeders that you see for sale in the newspapers. Few, if any, responsible breeders sell puppies through the classifieds....pups in the classifieds rarely come from proven, health-tested parents. For the high purchase price of a puppy, you could end up with a faulty temperament %26amp; costly health issues in a dog. Plus...even if the dog DOESN'T have problems, you've still got 6 months of carpet-wetting and chewing to deal with! With the housetrained adult, you skip all that stuff and get right to the fun of having a dog :).
I think your husband will always resent this dog.
Your daughter has not had time to bond or interact very much so perhaps it would be best to choose a different dog.
I personnally thinkthat adopting a shelter dog is an excellent idea. some do come with excess baggage it is true but not all. Most will make good pets given some time and patience.
i have a little dog I rescued he had some issues that we have worked through and is now a very well adjusted dog. not everyone has the time and patience to take on a dog like this. if you are a patient person and are home most of the day it could work out, however you do have a relatively young child to consider. perhaps not having an animal with unpredictable behaviour around her would be best.
There are of course two sides to this story, both you and your husband seem to be right. Shelter animals can have a lot of baggage, but most of them just need to be socialized. I think it would be a great idea for you to adopt Maggie, like you said she's been potty trained so she's obviously been with another owner who spent time to train her in one way or another.
You both looked at the situation from different sides, but neither one of you was wrong. I would say if your daughter likes the dog, and you feel safe with the dog around your daughter go for it!
I would have asked him what his problem was and where he got the idea that shelter dogs are bad. If Maggie is cleared ok with kids around your daughter's age and you both really like her, I say drag your husband down and let him meet her. Ten to one she'll win him over as well, either way let him get to meet her and then go from there.
Good luck
That's ridiculous, no offense.
If your daughter already fell in love with Maggie, then she obviously doesn't want a puppy.
Also, puppies are a crazy amount of work, as I'm sure both of you already know. It's better to adopt a shelter dog than get a puppy from a breeder (or a shelter for that matter). Pups have a higher chance being adopted than the dogs, and the chances of Maggie being adopted are quite slim to tell you the truth. I would advise you to get any information about Maggies history though, find out how she ended up in the shelter in the first place, epically since she's a purebred beagle; those puppies fetch quite a high price usually. Apart from her obvious shyness (which will pass once she gets to know you) are there any other issues with her?
I'd say go ahead and adopt poor old Maggie.
I think you reacted in a balanced rational way. Many shelter dogs even with the baggage can be extremely lovable %26amp; loyal. They seem to show their appreciation to a new lease on life, many really get it that they've been saved %26amp; Beagles are a precious breed. I don't know if your husband had his heart set on a puppy as your 5 year old, or was simply being protective %26amp; projecting his concern about the pets past, maybe both. It sounds like she's your dog %26amp; he's coming around.
Adopting a dog has been one of the best things I have ever done. I adopted an abused pit/lab/shepherd mix and she is the most wonderful dog you can imagine. At first she was scared, but we trained her well and taught her that she would no longer have to be afraid. Adopting a dog can teach your daughter a lot about helping out animals in need and she can learn that by adopting the dog, she saved a life. People think shelter dogs are not as good as other dogs, but I think they are just as good, if not, better! Please go ahead with the adoption, your husband will learn to love the dog and maybe this will change his views about shelter dogs
You did the right thing by waiting to talk to your husband. Marriage first. Research shows that a full grown dog is usually better with young kids(how old is your daughter?) than puppies because puppies may be too fragile for the rough play that children tend to participate in. I have a pound puppy myself and he is a great dog. Now he stayed timid for about a whole year after I brought him home but now he is so loyal that he has NEVER left the yard without a family member.
OMG. Adopt the dog. You made your choice. Your husband acquiesced. You daughter loves Maggie. Go with it.
A puppy is a lot of work. Too much work IMO. You'd have to put up with piddling and pooping in the house, obedience training from scratch....too much.
On the other hand, a shelter dog will be so grateful to live with you. You are teaching your daughter social responsibility by adopting a shelter dog. You are setting a great example. Save Maggie's life!
Older dogs also come with an understanding of the basic commands like sit or gimme your paw.
I wouldnt have reacted the same as what your husband did, I would probably be a bit sceptical at first, but knowing the dog is a beagle, I know it could never be agressive, Beagles are just to nicer dog :) I think that before you adopt Maggie, you should take your husband down to meet her, just to make sure that he likes her, because if he does that could make the situation a whole lot more stressful for both you and the dog, and we dont want that :) Try and convince him to go and meet her, I'm sure he'll fall in love :)
ADD: Why are you all so gun-ho about getting her to adopt this dog?? What happens if her husband doesnt like the dog?? What will happen then? She will be ripped away from another home and be put back into the shelter! Please dont just go out and adopt her, for her sake, let your husband meet her first before you bring her home.
I think it'd be fine for you to adopt Maggie.
- Your Daughter likes her
- She's house trained
- You'd be rescuing her from the shelter
- She would make a good addition to the family
Three years old is still fairly young for a dog. At three years old, I'm a sure a dog will still be very active and playful. The timid will fade away if you do get her and I think your husband will learn to love Maggie. But still be respectful to his opinions and talk about it some more.
i think it would be ok to adopt maggie
i am so happy that you are adopting and rehoming a dog
they deserve a new loving family and i think a beagle is just for you your husband and your daughter
they are very intelegent dogs
why dont you go to the shelter with your husband and show him maggie
he will see how happy your daughter is and hopefully take the dog
if she is house trained and things then thats even better so you dont have to worry about a few things then
i think you are doing a wonderful thing and your husband should love her
my dad didnt like the puppy we got but she grew on him and now there like best friends
hope this helped
email me if anything is wrong or if you need advice
Well, why doesn't he want to adopt the dog? Dogs from shelters actually have great health (most of the time). They're just like any other dogs. I think you should have him look at this question's answer. If your daughter loves Maggie I think you should get her. Your husband would get over it and quickly fall in love with the dog.
http://animal.discovery.com/breedselecto鈥?/a>
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